September 26, 2007

Random drive by

I think I just got punked by the Randoms ....

Posted by Bob Benz at 7:28 PM | Comments (2)

December 2, 2006

The official, irresistible tree party invite

Lara and I bagged a bodacious tree today and managed to get it into the house and into a stand without me going totally Grinch on her. Clearly, this bodes well for our Desecrate the Christmas Tree party. And after 17 years, we promise intrigue, assorted shenanigans and plenty of strangely great music.

Will LBJ's long lost father return to rescue him from the hillbillies in Tennessee?

Will Screamin' Jay Small enthrall the crowd with his soulful renditions of Britney Spears tunes?

Will the tree survive?

Only one way to find out, dude. Come to the party ... details below.

• Who: The Benz and Edge's
• What: Our 17th annual Christmas tree desecration party, in which assorted stooges put homemade, stupendously cool decorations on our unsuspecting evergreen. We have only one rule: You CAN'T buy the decoration. Also, remember that children and vegetarians are invited to the party. Ornaments should be rated "G" or "PG." Also, Sara Schwabe's Yankee Jass Band will perform, and there are rumors that Wailin' Jay Small will do a voodoo resurrection of the late, great Johnny Cash. And last but not least, LBJ will be on the scene.
• Where: 11517 Hardin Valley Road. I-40 to Pellissippi Parkway (toward Oak Ridge). Take the Hardin Valley Road exit off Pellissippi Parkway. Go left at the light, onto Hardin Valley. Go about 2.4 miles, past the elementary school and Steele Road on the right. Our house is the third driveway on the right after you pass Steele Road. We'll have it lit up, but watch closely. It can be tough to spot.
• Map
• Lost? Call 691-7731 or 604-7731.
• Important: We will have valet parking to avoid a repeat of The Stuck in the Mud Incident of 2000. You can either pull into the driveway and your car will be parked, or you can park at Sims store (near the elementary school, right before Steele Road) and you will be driven up to the party.
• When: Saturday, Dec. 16 at 7 p.m. Children and vegetarians are welcome.
• Why: Why not, wise guy?
• How: Make your own decoration. We'll have beer, Spiney's infamous margaritas, non-alcoholic beverages and vats of steaming green chile. Extra beverages and/or food will be welcome but aren't required
• Now Playing: Cancion Pa Ceiba from the album "Que Vaya Bien" by Roy Brown, Tito Auger, Tao Rodriguez Seeger.

Posted by Bob Benz at 8:13 PM | Comments (0)

January 3, 2006

Trimmed tree ...

The final result of our tree decorating party. The tree is no longer with us. I don't have much tolerance for Christmas once Dec. 26 rolls around. By the 27th, I'd totally Grinched the house and things were back to normal.

Posted by Bob Benz at 8:58 AM | Comments (0)

December 18, 2005

Screaming Jay ...

I'm thinking this guy and Muddy Waters were separated at birth. Or maybe not ...

Posted by Bob Benz at 6:55 PM | Comments (1)

November 20, 2005

More LBJ antics ...

LBJ recently made the scene for several more photo opportunities.

These include our littlest president participating in a high-power conference call, cavorting with Rusty poolside and getting artistic.

Posted by Bob Benz at 7:33 PM | Comments (3)

August 28, 2005

Cortez the killer

LBJ was almost taken away with the dirty dishes in Amsterdam and left behind at a restaurant in Helsinki. But neither of those experiences prepared him for his brush with death in Mexico.

While Wes and I were introducing LBJ to the beach at Cabo San Lucas, a rogue wave reached up out of the Sea of Cortez and grabbed the little feller, sucking him out to sea. It was only with quick thinking and derring do that Wes charged into the surf to pluck our little president out of peril. Sadly, Wes suffered a cut on one of his paws that served as an excuse to stay close to the pool (and the tequila) for much of the rest of the trip.

I've uploaded several new photos to the LBJ gallery that document his adventures in Mexico, but I forgot to include this one, which is one of my favorites. I'll add it later. The new stuff in the gallery is toward the bottom of this page.

The time is coming when LBJ must return from whence he came. But how?

Posted by Bob Benz at 6:41 PM | Comments (0)

July 4, 2005

Another day, more LBJ ...

Lorna and Ben came to visit this weekend, giving them an opportunity to hang out with LBJ.

Lorna lived with us two summers ago, when she was an intern in our online group. After two years of intensive therapy, she's almost recovered. Ben is her Mr. Fixit boyfriend.

We invited several other folks over on Saturday night, and everyone got a chance to hang with LBJ. Just click here to go to the gallery with the latest photos ...

We're now up to 159 photos in the LBJ and Me gallery. I think it's officially become an obsession.

Posted by Bob Benz at 4:10 PM | Comments (0)

April 1, 2005

No laughing matter

This is bizarre. Even a little creepy. Two comics in this morning's paper both did a Ouija board bit. And they both had the same punch line.

It leaves me wondering if the writers of Foxtrot and Get Fuzzy were in cahoots, or voices from beyond were guiding their pens.

I mean, I can see this happening, maybe. But with both running on the same morning? And almost the same wording? Perhaps it's some sort of April Fool's joke?

(Cue Twilight Zone music here ...)

Posted by Bob Benz at 7:10 AM | Comments (4)

March 17, 2005

Big Bone Lick

LBJ got a taste of Big Bone Lick (State Park) during a recent trip to Cincinnati. And he liked it.

The little feller from the big ol' state went to Cincinnati, where he made a lot of new friends and engaged in stimulating discussions about online tactics and strategies. But he was most impressed with northern Kentucky, home of Big Bone Lick State Park and more Daniel Boone references than you can shake a stick at.

Photos at the bottom of this page and here, too.

LBJ also had a bit of a scare on his way back from Denver last week. Delta Airlines decided to help him rack up some frequent flier miles while he was riding in my luggage, and he was missing in action for a day or two. Not sure where all he went. He's not talking, and Delta has issued only a terse "no comment."

Next stop: Dallas, Texas, where the Loon is bracing for a presidential encounter.

Now playing: Keep My Skillet Good And Greasy from the album "The Asch Recordings, Vol. 2: Muleskinner Blues" by Woody Guthrie

Posted by Bob Benz at 8:35 PM | Comments (2)

March 13, 2005

LBJ's Rocky Mountain high ...

LBJ made his way to Denver, where he generally ran amok and had a presidential good time.

During his most recent trip, our little president got to play with camels, hang out in Denver drinking establishments and experience a weekend of infinite Totsy.

He added a lot of new photos to his collection, especially on the second and third index pages. Make sure you check them out. LBJ would be much obliged.

And here are a few non-LBJ related Denver photos.

Now playing: 99 Year Blues from the album "Burgers" by Hot Tuna

Posted by Bob Benz at 8:44 PM | Comments (3)

March 6, 2005

Go west, LBJ

LBJ hopped a plan and headed to the left coast for a few days last week, getting a gander of the Pacific Ocean and meeting lots of cool people along the way.

I've been amazed at how much people like to have their pictures made with LBJ. Everyone from HowardOwens.com to random folks at Ventura, Calif., bars to Internet Movers and Shakers to patron saints.

He's also getting some play on one or two other blogs ...

Needless to say, a good time was had by all.

But LBJ is suffering a bit of jet lag and he needed a bit of recovery during the weekend. Next stop: Denver, Colorado.

And don't forget, you can see all of LBJ's antics and travels here.

Now playing: Tore Up Over You from the album "Don't Let Go (Disc2)" by Jerry Garcia Band

Posted by Bob Benz at 8:50 PM | Comments (0)

February 19, 2005

LBJ and me

Ever since our littlest president showed up in Tennessee and asked for political asylum, I've been thinking there are big social issues at play here. I just haven't been able to nail down exactly what they are.

But then it dawned on me. A photo essay called LBJ and Me. From now forward, I vow to give everyone who comes to my house the privilege of being photographed with LBJ. This essay is the beginning of the prodigious and important sociological enterprise. I even took our littlest president on a road trip to my workplace, where he got hopped up on chile and engaged in acts that the FCC might deem unfit for prime time television. But what else would you expect from a liberal Democrat.

Viva la Great Society!

Posted by Bob Benz at 8:10 PM | Comments (0)

October 31, 2004

Hey, who stole John Kerry?

Click to see larger version



So someone in this Republican bastion decided to go through an upscale Knoxville neighborhood and abscond with all the John Kerry signs to be seen. Normally, this is politics as usual. But the abductor stepped on the toes of my friend Andre.

Now, Andre isn't terribly political. In fact, he's not even a U.S. citizen and can't vote. The sign was placed there by his girlfriend, bleeding heart Vikki. But the theft of this sign really rubbed Andre the wrong way. He and I are a lot of like. We obsess about the small things, and this was a small thing worth obsessing over.

So Andre went out, secured two more John Kerry signs and put them in his yard, determined to be undaunted by this right-wing sign thief.

But this really brought out the Ho Chi Minh in me. I decided to shift into prankster mode and take John Kerry into captivity each time Andre put him back in the front yard. I made a point of driving by there and grabbing the signs, tossing them in the back of my truck, and stealing away. Andre started mumbling about setting booby traps and resorting to video surveillance.

And then I launched my coup de grace.

With great care and the help of the every devious Herb, I recrafted the Kerry signs in my own image. When Andre went to pick up Vikki at work, I left, planning to get to their house, plant a few Benz for President signs on the front yard and wait on the side porch for Andre to pull in and see them.

But I was dealing with a crafty victim. He knew something was up. Apparently, Vikki had gone over the top telling Andre how amused I was by his sign fever. And he suspected something was up, but couldn't quite pinpoint it. Although he'd told Vikki he was on his way, he really was hiding out in the house, waiting to catch a sign thief.

I got there, planted my signs and went around to the side porch, where I was talking to Vikki on my cell, wondering why Andre hadn't arrived yet to get her. That's when Andre burst out the back door and nabbed me.

When he saw the signs, though, I realized all was not lost. He really got a charge out of it, even if my prank went somewhat awry.

Posted by Bob Benz at 5:53 PM | Comments (4)